The old us .

I've been actually quite worried about my health and some other personal stuff of mine , I wonder what do you think on the other side ? These few days I've been thinking back our old time . The old us . The moment I decided to be with you and started all these promises is when I think you're the one who I can rely on . The one who I can talk to , the one who tell me everything is fine when you're with me . I'm a girl who get panic easily , when thing goes wrong or even many more such like asking where is my phone when Im holding it , or as stupid as doing things wrongly and stuff like that . Not to say about big stuff like argue with family and so on .. You'll never get tired of consoling me . You'll always find a way to help me and tell me don't worry , when I'm by the side you need not worry . I wonder does this sentence seems similiar to you ? I wonder and wonder . 


I wonder even if you're reading this are you sure what am I talking all about . I try not to bring yesterday stuff up and tot that everyday is another day . But have you really asked my heart and how I feel personally ? Don't give me all materials yet the basic needs you can't even give . You asked me ' if I was about to find another one when you're study abroad ..' I said , if you were doing your best you need not worry a single shits . Yet you're didnt even give me a single confident that I wanted so badly .. 


When things and problems come up , I talked to you you smile or even laugh or changed topic . Is it this is the real you ? I feel so lonely when things come up you're not consoling me yet you try to just fu hin me like a common friend would do : Dont think too much .  Do you know what are you talking ?!


Deep down in my heart , I disappointed like shit . Yet , who knows ? 

I'm all alone